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Peggy Farooqi
Mum of 3 (1994, 1995, 1998)- born in East Germany --lived in UK/ Kent since 1993 -- studied criminology -- love reading / writing / travelling / needlecraft 
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4 January 2014


Title
Die fremde Braut
Author
Necla Kelek
Publisher: Kiepenheuer and Witsch Verlag
Publication Dat
28 February 2005
Pages
160
Genre
non-fiction, social science




This is a German non-fiction book which really opened my eyes regarding the 'multi-cultural' society and integration. Kelek is a German feminist. The title translates roughly into 'The foreign Bride', but the word 'fremde' in German is also equivalent with 'estranged'. Kelek, a Turkish lady living in Germany, why integration of Turkish people into German society is proving so difficult, and ultimately, appears not to work. She starts off by explaining life in Turkey, and the concept of honour which, in fact, is very different to what I would have understood as honour, in fact honour is considered more important than life (including the life of a loved one). Forced marriage and bringing the bride to Germany, a bride who does not speak the language, does not know the culture and is not only not encouraged to learn the language and integrate, but, if she is lucky, only discouraged or worse, even forced to hide away and not make any contact with Germany and Germans.  I could never quite understand why , for example, Turkish people living in Germany don't really want to have anything to do with Germans. Kelek shows the deep roots in culture. For me, the underlying message was 'Try to understand!' and , according to Kelek, there is no happy ending to this book.

If you have never experienced this culture, you may find it very difficult to understand and may find yourself getting very angry and shaking your head in disbelief. 

I can image that the book was very controversial in Germany. I can just hope that, one day, we can all live peacefully together. In the words of John Lennon 'Image':You may say I'm a dreamer, but I'm not the only one. I hope someday you'll join us and the world will be as one.